Even if your ideas are good, even if you are talented, even if you think you deserve to have a voice, if you are always complaining and always whining, people actually do not want to help you or go out of their way for you.
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When I was 20, I was a singer-songwriter and I was very, very committed to getting signed and going full time. It actually happened once. I had a manager and an independent record label chose me and they were really keen to work with me. After a few months of working with them they very quickly and suddenly dropped me. They decided they did not want to work with me. At the time I was devastated. I had no idea why they had done it and what had happened. 20 years later, I sometimes look back at that time and I think that I have an idea why it happened.
When I was 20 and I had this record label that was interested in me, I thought I was really special and I thought I had some kind of right to complain about everything that went wrong in my life or everything that went wrong with me. If I did not get the break that I thought I deserved, I would complain about it, if I did not get an opportunity to perform in a certain venue then I would complain about it. In Australia habitual complainers are called “whingers.” I think, in reflection, probably my biggest downfall in my 20s was that I was a whinger. I actually believed that I had some right to whinge and complain about everything because I was more special than everyone else.
Clearly I did not learn this lesson very quickly. I remember in my late twenties I was working in a corporate banking environment and I could see a lot of things that could be improved. I was quick with ideas but when my ideas were not adopted, I started complaining instead of getting on with the job and once again, I sabotaged my own success. If you complain all the time, even if your ideas are good and you are talented and think you deserve to have a voice, if you are always complaining or whining, people will not want to help you or go out of their way for you. Fortunately I have learned now that a healthier way to do my life is to whinge less and to be more focused on finding a solution, cooperating with others and helping others.
If you want to get ahead, if you want to do more and be more in your life, then find solutions to your problems rather than complaining about them. When you do the work, you will be amazed at how people come alongside you, want to be a part of the solution and want to get you to where you want to go just by you having a different mindset and a different attitude to what you are doing.
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